Wedding Wednesday: Beach Wedding

Alyssa + Chris // Destination Wedding | Outer Banks, NC from Josh Gooden on Vimeo.

Is this video not incredible?

I just love everything about it.

The music for the video, the genuine expressions on everyone's faces that are being filmed, the scenery which I grew up spending so much time at (the big orange sunrise on the beach, the mid-day on the gritty sand of OBX, NC, and the orange-pink sunsets of the Sound), every element and moment is captured with this video.

Some people make things really formal, which is fine. I like how this ceremony was a good middle ground. Super sweet. Apparently the minister is a huge hit up and down the Banks, for all kinds of ceremonies.

And yes, I did sniffle a bit watching this video!

Credits:
Music: Hoppípolla by Sigur Rós
Officiant: Reverend Jay Bowman
Blog: joshgooden.com/​blog/​2010/​10/​alyssa-chris-destination-wedding-outer-banks/​

TWW

I'm thinking that when I am 30 I will do the Amy Gardner hair, circa season 3 of The West Wing. Loved her character, such a badass.

Here is how we first got to get to know her:

"Something important" being her latest project of balloon animals... yup, that's awesome.

If any couple could make witty banter look good, it's Josh Lyman and Amy Garner on The West Wing. Love love love.


As a blogger wrote, "She likes dancing to Van Morrison, and doesn’t see why balloon-animals could be considered unprofessional. Amy Gardner is good at her job, and doesn’t worry that other people might not like her. She’s an adult, albeit with a personality that is uniquely suited to annoy the hell out of everyone she dislikes."
Hmmm sounds like something an ex said about me one time, "with a personality that is uniquely suited to annoy the hell out of everyone she dislikes." Me likey as that ex, S, was incredibly accurate in his assessment!

"Because I can't make decisions based on the fact that I like your smooth skin."
{loved. them. together.}


So, did any of my readers watch The West Wing when it was on TV? How about now, as it has rerun marathons occasionally on Bravo (although much less often now that they are the reality TV network).

Muted Monday

My Gaga is a lovely lady - she is on the far right here (with my Mom and her sister N on Easter in 1979).


A great lady in my life is my Grandmama. She is a lovely person, too. (you know I had to throw in the picture of me as a bebe! ha!) <3


Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't.

-Margaret Thatcher



Another great lady is my Mother.

All are ladies as well as people who come from "good, hearty stock." They take pride in education, critical thinking and all the good things in life. They are powerful female figures in my life, while still being ladies, too! Love love love them all.

[thank you to Issue One of Matchbook Magazine for that quote]

Honeymoon Locations in the South: Part 5

Just down the road a bit from yesterday's feature, the Grove Park Inn, is the lovely Inn at Biltmore Estate.
No, you do not get to stay at THE Biltmore Estate, seen below...

...but you can always tour it if you would like. Especially if you stay in the Cottage on the grounds - yes, a 2 bedroom, 2 bath cottage on the grounds of the Biltmore Estate is available for you to vacation, or honeymoon, at. It is definitely the man-made highlight of the Asheville area.

This lovely Inn comes a close second and, as you can tell, it was designed to mirror the Estate it was named for:

How could you not love the view of the Blue Ridge Mountains from this dining room?

Don't you just love the stone details?

Would you like to take afternoon tea from this lobby?

Maybe you would rather take a nap in your room, with its own view of the lovely landscape?

Maybe once you check in to the Inn, you decide to go to the Spa for some treatment. A mani-pedi or massage, perhaps? While you decide, sit in the relaxation room:

I normally go for a massage, so this room is where you would find me!

On a side note: The Biltmore Estate is still family owned. I would like to point out that yes, that huge monstrosity that is based off of various features of Italian palazzi and French chateaux is STILL family owned. What the Biltmore family, today primarily the Cecil family, has done is diversify the massive amount of lands that they inherited (8,000+ acres, yup). Frederick Law Olmstead designed the landscapes. These diversifications are what has led to a very successful winery, spa, the Inn, Land Rover driving school, horseback riding, etc. - most of them made public in my lifetime. They have come a long way and I wish them the best as they continue to be successful!

Favorite Women: Katharine Hepburn

Growing up, one of my favorite women was Katharine Hepburn.



This is probably because my Grandmama looked a lot like her growing up.

And as I got older a beau compared me to her at one point, calling me "Hepburn-esque," likely one of the best compliments I will ever earn in my lifetime.



Some of my favorite quotes by Ms. Hepburn:

"Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get - only with what you are expecting to give - which is everything."



"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun."



"We are taught you must blame your father, your sisters, your brothers, the school, the teachers - you can blame anyone but never blame yourself. It's never your fault. But it's always your fault, because if you wanted to change, you're the one who has got to change. It's as simple as that, isn't it?"



"It would be a terrific innovation if you could get your mind to stretch a little further than the next wisecrack."



"Life is to be lived. If you have to support yourself, you had bloody well better find some way that is going to be interesting. And you don't do that by sitting around wondering about yourself."



Those of you who follow my Twitter or know me personally know that I have had a rough week. This quote by her has always made me feel better:

"Life can be wildly tragic at times, and I've had my share. But whatever happens to you, you have to keep a slightly comic attitude. In the final analysis, you have got not to forget to laugh."

Perfect for a Rainy, Cold Day

I love this song. This song is perfect because today the weather is rainy and cold, more November-style weather than late September in Virginia. I find the song to be fitting!



The singers are Ingrid Michaelson and Sara Bareilles, two performers I love. I have seen Ingrid in Charlottesville, and they have been popular critically but not huge on the popular music charts. For example, Ingrid has had about five or six songs featured on "Grey's Anatomy" on major episodes with huge storylines. Doesn't the song just pull at your heartstrings?


I am trying to stay involved with this blog, but right now I have a LOT going on, so please bear with me readers!


(C) 2008 SONY BMG MUSIC ENTERTAINMENT

Wedding Website - Questions

So I am tentatively posting M and my wedding website at some point... not on here, just in general... probably after we "at some point" get our engagement photos done. Because it seems like everyone does these ridiculous photo shoots where people either look great or absolutely ridiculous. In some that I've seen, couples have worn blue jeans and JEAN SHORTS, with shades of blue t-shirts on. That isn't my cup of tea. I mean really, who MATCHES their fiancee? Don't you match your elementary school class or your siblings? It basically creeped M and I out to a whole new level. M and I are not a fan of that.

One good friend of mine, with impeccable taste, did an incredible photo shoot with her now-husband. It was in Norfolk, and they posed on bicycles and in the old neighborhoods (maybe even including Ghent) - and it was incredibly retro-chic with a boho vibe that fit her personality. They kind-of coordinated outfits but it didn't look stupid. It looked relaxed and effortless. I really adored their photos, because they were high quality shots that didn't look forced at all. That's what we want to go for.

Soooo back to the wedding website. This opportunity is unknown territory for my family and I, as I am the first child in my extended family to get married in 11 years. Yup, ELEVEN. So, 11 years ago, wedding websites didn't even exist yet. TheKnot.com was brand new and even that took some meandering around the internet. Everything was still mostly done in print. I am grateful to have several wedding etiquette books but I still have some questions I would appreciate hearing from you all about.

Registry listing: Many acquaintances and friends have posted their registry links on their wedding website. It is an optional tab on the sidebar, not on the main page. Is this okay? Or is it a no-no?

Engagement Story: How in-depth do you all get about the engagement story? The day we got engaged, M didn't even let me bring a camera, I think he wanted to keep it between us and not broadcast all over the world. My sister and her husband had it done similarly. On a beach in Jamaica, no camera. Then it is something kept between you two, and then you tell who you feel about it because they weren't there. Is the engagement story a tell or not tell feature for a wedding website? As Peggy Post puts it in her book, "Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette," she says, "Don't include overly personal information...such as when you shared your first kiss, what you did on your first date, and so on (pg. 173)."

Ring: Do you show the ring in photos? Or do you only post photos that have the ring subtly displayed in a posed image?

Honeymoon: Do you share information about the honeymoon? M and I are on the fence about this information, as we feel as though it is ostentatious - but if it is the norm, we are certainly open to this option.

I would really love everyone's input on these things, because some tread the line between over-sharing and just letting people know.


As a side note, some people have asked my opinion on another new wedding "tradition" (?? definitely not the right word). I would like to point out that just like Judith Martin's "Miss Manners' Guide to a Surprisingly Dignified Wedding" you could not [even with a gun to my head] have me consider ever posting anything along the lines of "Create a Gift" or "Contribute to Honeymoon/Mortgage/etc." as I find them tasteless, crass, and inappropriate. Okay, off of my soapbox now.

A Personal Goal

MJA and I are engaged. Duh. Everyone knows that at this point. [no, that isn't us]



He works in a very secure, salaried Federal job as a LEO. We both look forward to when I am done with school and can support my shopping habits as well as contribute to the household - right now I do what I can when I can but to maintain a Deans List status I can't work too many hours.



Anyway, so I do work SOME, and I can work maybe a few hours more.



A personal goal of mine is to start saving up for this wedding. Thankfully it is in 16 months and with MJA and I saving together we actually can make a good dent. I am hoping Macon cooperates and so I can put the rest of my mutual funds into the wedding fund so we can have a great party with many of our family and friends in attendence.



Our goal is to have $10,000-12,000 in cash for this wedding. Many vendors only accept checks in my small hometown, so it's pretty logical to have that much on hand. My Mom just retired so I am not about to let my parents foot a majority of the bill. MJA and I can do pretty well and they can help a small bit. MJA said last night, "if we only have to charge $2,500-3,000 of wedding stuff, I will be so happy." Well, I will be happy too, so this blog is not going to be ALL about finances, but you will see me talk more about saving and having a traditional, small town wedding in a lovely location and a fun reception - I'll try to make these entries on a weekly basis...

XOXO

Pics:

1. Weddingbee.com
2. http://www.fleoa.org
3. & 4. Wordpress
5. myheartofvirginia.com

Engaged!

Hey all, so... if you haven't heard on my Twitter (worthystyle), then surprise!! I am engaged! It finally happened, and I only say that because PBF and I have talked about it since we first got together and got serious about six months into our relationship!!

PBF did it on Sunday, June 13 in the Italian gardens at Maymont in Richmond, VA. It is a beautiful place where we have always enjoyed spending the day walking around and cuddling, picnicing, etc. It was HOT and he knew that so he tried to get me up and into the City early early in the AM. I had a hunch it was going to happen but I was not positive about it. I had had "hunches" before and was wrong so I was pretty flip about it!

Here are a few pictures so you can see how genuinely beautiful Maymont's Italian garden is:










However, Maymont is not just an Italian Garden. There is also the Japanese Garden, the Maymont House, the wildlife and nature center, as well as the Children's Farm. It is located on 100 acres in the middle of Richmond. It was built by the Major James Dooley for his wife Sallie in the 1890s. When they died they bequeathed the entire Estate to the City of Richmond.

It is very romantic and lovely. He asked me after we got to the Park at around 11:30am on that Sunday. He asked me in the gazebo. NO ONE was around to take our pictures, and I had no camera! He even told me not to bring one! All I got was stuff from my Blackberry... sigh... We went to walk around and I just kept looking at the ring... couldn't help it! I am very happy and PBF has amazing taste. He designed it himself.

In this picture, you can faintly see the gazebo he asked me in by my pinky finger. Lots of photos are done of the wrought iron gazebo on the other side of the garden, but we've always called that one our "nook". This waterfall falls into the Japanese Gardens below the Italian one...:




The below photo is from the Italian Gardens fountain from the bottom. Isn't the architecture great? The Dooleys had specialists from their home country come to Richmond to work on these gardens... many spent over a year or five working on these gardens making sure they were as accurate as possible to the taste of their home country.:



This close-up of the ring was taken by my brother J on Father's Day this weekend. PBF (who we will now call MJA as he is not just a BF anymore!) and I went over with Lily the dog on Friday PM. What a great weekend to celebrate with family all kinds of things! Our engagement, my Pappy's 92nd birthday, Father's Day, etc.!




Picture 1 from gonomad.com, Picture 2 from Pyogenes, Picture 3 from Todd Dixon blog, , Picture 4-5 from me, Picture 6 from my brother

Ode to the Nice Girls

Rant: Ode to the Nice girl
Date: 2005-11-27, 9:18PM EST

Ode to the Nice Girls
This rant was written because a nice girl finally snapped.


I've read the tribute to the nice guys; this is my response.

This is my tribute to the nice girls. To the nice girls who are overlooked, who become friends and nothing more, who spend hours fixating upon their looks and their personalities and their actions because it must be they that are doing something wrong. This is for the girls who don't give it up on the first date, who don't want to play mind games, who provide a comforting hug and a supportive audience for a story they've heard a thousand times. This is for the girls who understand that they aren't perfect and that the guys they're interested in aren't either, for the girls who flirt and laugh and worry and obsess over the slightest glance, whisper, touch, because somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe... maybe this time he'll have understood. This is an homage to the girls who laugh loud and often, who are comfortable in skirts and sweats and combat boots, who care more than they should for guys who don't deserve their attention. This is for those girls who have been in the trenches, who have watched other girls time and time again fake up and make up and fuck up the guys in their lives without saying a word. This is for the girls who have been there from the beginning and have heard the trite words of advice, from "there are plenty of fish in the sea," to "time heals all wounds." This is to honor those girls who know that guys are just as scared as they are, who know that they deserve better, who are seeking to find it.

This is for the girls who have never been in love, but know that it's an experience that they don't want to miss out on. For the girls who have sought a night with friends and been greeted by a night of catcalling, rude comments and explicit invitations that they'd rather not have experienced. This is for the girls who have spent their weekends sitting on the sidelines of a beer pong tournament or a case race, or playing Florence Nightingale for a vomiting guy friend or a comatose crush, who have received a drunk phone call just before dawn from someone who doesn't care enough to invite them over but is still willing to pass out in their bed. This is for the girls who have left sad song lyrics in their away messages, who have tried to make someone understand through a subliminally appealing profile, who have time and time again dropped their male friend hint after hint after hint only to watch him chase after the first blonde girl in a skirt. This is for the girls who have been told that they're too good or too smart or too pretty, who have been given compliments as a way of breaking off a relationship, who have ever been told they are only wanted as a friend.

This one's for the girls who you can take home to mom, but won't because it's easier to sleep with a whore than foster a relationship; this is for the girls who have been led on by words and kisses and touches, all of which were either only true for the moment, or never real to begin with. This is for the girls who have allowed a guy into their head and heart and bed, only to discover that he's just not ready, he's just not over her, he's just not looking to be tied down; this is for the girls who believe the excuses because it's easier to believe that it's not that they don't want you, it's that they don't want anyone. This is for the girls who have had their hearts broken and their hopes dashed by someone too cavalier to have cared in the first place; this is for the nights spent dissecting every word and syllable and inflection in his speech, for the nights when you've returned home alone, for the nights when you've seen from across the room him leaning a little too close, or standing a little too near, or talking a little too softly for the girl he's with to be a random hookup. This is for the girls who have endured party after party in his presence, finally having realized that it wasn't that he didn't want a relationship: it was that he didn't want you. I honor you for the night his dog died or his grandmother died or his little brother crashed his car and you held him, thinking that if you only comforted him just right, or said the right words, or rubbed his back in the right way then perhaps he'd realize what it was that he already had. This is for the night you realized that it would never happen, and the sunrise you saw the next morning after failing to sleep.

This is for the "I really like you, so let's still be friends" comment after you read more into a situation than he ever intended; this is for never realizing that when you choose friends, you seldom choose those which make you cry yourself to sleep. This is for the hugs you've received from your female friends, for the nights they've reassured you that you are beautiful and intelligent and amazing and loyal and truly worthy of a great guy; this is for the despair you all felt as you sat in the aftermath of your tears, knowing that that night the only companionship you'd have was with a pillow and your teddy bear. This is for the girls who have been used and abused, who have endured what he was giving because at least he was giving something; this is for the stupidity of the nights we've believed that something was better than nothing, though his something was nothing we'd have ever wanted. This is for the girls who have been satisfied with too little and who have learned never to expect anything more: for the girls who don't think that they deserve more, because they've been conditioned for so long to accept the scraps thrown to them by guys.

This is what I don't understand. Men sit and question and whine that girls are only attracted to the mean guys, the guys who berate them and belittle them and don't appreciate them and don't want them; who use them for sex and think of little else than where their next conquest will be made. Men complain that they never meet nice girls, girls who are genuinely interested and compelling, who are intelligent and sweet and smart and beautiful; men despair that no good women want to share in their lives, that girls play mindgames, that girls love to keep them hanging. Yet, men, I ask you: were you to meet one of these genuinely interested, thrillingly compelling, interesting and intelligent and sweet and beautiful and smart girls, were you to give her your number and wait for her to call... and if you were to receive a call from her the next day and she, in her truthful, loyal, intelligent and straightforward nice girl fashion, were to tell you that she finds you intriguing and attractive and interesting and worth her time and perhaps material from which she could fashion a boyfriend, would you or would you not immediately call your friends to tell them of the "stalker chick" you'd met the night prior, who called you and wore her heart on her sleeve and told the truth? And would you, or would you not, refuse to make plans with her, speak with her, see her again, and once again return to the bar or club or party scene and search once more for this "nice girl" who you just cannot seem to find? Because therein lies the truth, guys: we nice girls are everywhere. But you're not looking for a nice girl. You're not looking for someone genuinely interested in your intramural basketball game, or your anatomy midterm grade, or that argument you keep having with your father; you're looking for a quick fix, a night when you can pretend to have a connection with another human being which is just as disposable as the condom you were using during it.

So don't say you're on the lookout for nice girls, guys, when you pass us up on every step you take. Sometimes we go undercover; sometimes we go in disguise: sometimes when that girl in the low cut shirt or the too tight miniskirt won't answer your catcalls, sometimes you're looking at a nice girl in whore's clothing - - we might say we like the attention, we might blush and giggle and turn back to our friends, but we're all thinking the same thing: "This isn't me. Tomorrow morning, I'll be wearing a teeshirt and flannel shorts, I'll have slept alone and I'll be making my hungover best friend breakfast. See through the disguise. See me." You never do. Why? Because you only see the exterior, you only see the slutty girl who welcomes those advances. You don't want the nice girl.. so don't say you're looking for a relationship: relationships take time and energy and intent, three things we're willing to extend - - but in return, we're looking for compassion and loyalty and trust, three things you never seem willing to express. Maybe nice guys finish last, but in the race they're running they're chasing after the whores and the sluts and the easy-targets... the nice girls are waiting at the finish line with water and towels and a congratulatory hug (and yes, if she's a nice girl and she likes you, the sweatiness probably won't matter), hoping against hope that maybe you'll realize that they're the ones that you want at the end of that silly race.

So maybe it won't last forever. Maybe some of those guys in that race will turn in their running shoes and make their way to the concession stand where we're waiting; however, until that happens, we still have each other, that silly race to watch, and all the chocolate we can eat (because what's a concession stand at a race without some chocolate?)

Sometimes the nice girl gets sick of waiting.

PostingID: 114087824


From The Best of Craigslist: Philadelphia [http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/phi/114087824.html] This is a take on one I originally posted in my first blog in April of 2005, and this was posted in November of 2005... not sure where the original one came from but this is somewhat plagiarized from that original one I found... but still, the point is true.

Want It Now: Layla L'Obatti for Between the Sheets

I love a good article of clothing.



Um, I want this. Desperately. In any of the colors it is sold in. This piece may look familiar, as it was in the June 2010 issue of Instyle Magazine for the "Charlotte York" aka Kristin Davis shoot. The piece is done by Layla L'Obatti for Between the Sheets lingerie.

Here is a screencap of their website:



I love fun random lingerie additions to my wardrobe (most of you understand why this portion of my wardrobe is the largest). I am working on acruing fine silk pieces as they can be integrated into other parts of the wardrobe (under a suit jacket, for example, a silk chemise or cami is completely different). Depending on the cardigan or climate, sometimes you can even pull them off with jeans. It really depends on your personal taste. I have two that are vintage from my Mother's dresser (which she hadn't worn in decades if ever) and they are baby blue and pastel pink silk chemises with white lace. I've been using them as sleepwear, under cardigans with jeans, and under suit jackets for 5+ years, it just depends on the mood!





This set in red is very sensual, the light peach is fun, and I really don't consider the ivory to be bridal but that is how Between the Sheets is marketing it (see the top of this post). Whatever. I am a pale WASP so I tend to go for non-white sets. Just so I don't look like Casper but that is a personal preference... I am sure under candlelight it is flattering but for multiple purposes I'd likely go with the red or peach.



Isn't this gorgeous? I am in love. I think full-length chemise pieces are pretty amazing. A LOT of manhours go into silk pieces like this one. Many designers require seamstresses to wear gloves just to sew the lace on - which often has to be done by hand so it gets finished right. It is nice, just for something different. The heels are optional. Consider it added to my wishlist.

You and Me by DMB

Best performance of the Grammy's!!!:


I hope CBS posts a better quality - but the music is great - gives me goosebumps!



Here is the actual music video:




Lyrics
Wanna pack your bags, Something small
Take what you need and we disappear
Without a trace we'll be gone, gone
The moon and the stars can follow the car
and then when we get to the ocean
We gonna take a boat to the end of the world
All the way to the end of the world

Oh, and when the kids are old enough
We're gonna teach them to fly

You and me together, we could do anything, Baby
You and me together yes, yes (x2)

You and I, we're not tied to the ground
Not falling but rising like rolling around
Eyes closed above the rooftops
Eyes closed, we're gonna spin through the stars
Our arms wide as the sky
We gonna ride the blue all the way to the end of the world
To the end of the world

Oh, and when the kids are old enough
We're gonna teach them to fly

You and me together, we could do anything, Baby
You and me together yes, yes

We can always look back at what we did
All these memories of you and me baby
But right now it's you and me forever girl
And you know we could do better than anything that we did
You know that you and me, we could do anything

You and me together, we could do anything, Baby
You and me together yeah, yeah
Two of us together, we could do anything, baby
You and me together yeah, yeah
Two of us together yeah, yeah
Two of us together, we could do anything, baby

Song of the Moment: "Sweet Disposition"

Currently, the song of the moment in my life is "Sweet Disposition" by The Temper Trap. It's been on a few TV ads, used as promos on TV for shows, and was on the 500 Days of Summer movie soundtrack.

It's one of those songs that represents things going on in my life right now. Repetitive, sure, but I like how the music builds in the background... Reminds me of some of the earlier songs by The Killers... when they first started playing in Vegas in 2002. I saw them at a show in early '03 and I was hooked by their sound (not looks, promise).

For me, this song hits me when I sit and think about the lyrics - like it playing when I am stuck in traffic. Makes me think about how I am finishing my education, how I am likely with the guy I am marrying and spending the rest of my life with, how different things were just 2 years ago - which still feels unsettling to me on occasion - with people I was seeing, etc... moving on and being this FAR moved on feels weird because it sometimes feels like I am rushing it because I am with 'an older man'. Whatever. This post is about a song I like, so I will drop the "deep stuff".

I love it, so enjoy!


Lyrics:

sweet disposition, never too soon
oh reckless abandon, like no one's watching you

a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh
a kiss, a cry
our rights, our wrongs
a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh
a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh

just stay there, 'cause i'll be comin over
and while our bloods still young
it's so young, it runs, and we won't stop til it's over
won't stop to surrender

songs of desperation
I played them for you
a moment, a love,
a dream, a laugh,
a kiss, a cry,
our rights, our wrongs
a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh
a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh

just stay there, 'cause i'll be comin over
and while our bloods still young
it's so young, it runs, and we won't stop til it's over
won't stop to surrender

a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh
a kiss, a cry
our rights, our wrongs (won't stop til it's over)
a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh
a kiss, a cry
our rights, our wrongs(won't stop til it's over)
a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh
a kiss, a cry
our rights, our wrongs (won't stop til it's over)
a moment, a love
a dream, a laugh
a moment, a love
a moment, a love (won't stop to surrender)

For Izzy, today

Ode to the Nice Girls
This is my tribute to the nice girls. To the nice girls who are overlooked, who become friends and nothing more, who spend hours fixating upon their looks and their personalities and their actions because it must be they that are doing something wrong. This is for the girls who don't give it up on the first date, who don't want to play mind games, who provide a comforting hug and a supportive audience for a story they've heard a thousand times. This is an homage to the girls who laugh loud and often, who are comfortable in skirts and sweats and combat boots, who care more than they should for guys who don't deserve their attention. This is for those girls who have been in the trenches, who have watched other girls time and time again fake up and make up and fuck up the guys in their lives without saying a word. This is for the girls who have been there from the beginning and have heard the trite words of advice, from "there are plenty of fish in the sea," to "time heals all wounds."

This is for the girls who have spent their weekends sitting on the sidelines of a beer pong tournament or a case race, or playing Florence Nightingale for a vomiting guy friend or a comatose crush, who have received a drunk phone call just before dawn from someone who doesn't care enough to invite them over but is still willing to pass out in their bed. This is for the girls who have left sad song lyrics in their away messages, who have time and time again dropped their male friend hint after hint after hint. This is for the girls who have been told that they're too good or too smart or too pretty, who have been given compliments as a way of breaking off a relationship.

This one's for the girls who you can take home to mom, but won't because it's easier to sleep with a whore than foster a relationship; this is for the girls who have been led on by words and kisses and touches, all of which were either only true for the moment, or never real to begin with. This is for the girls who have had their hearts broken and their hopes dashed by someone too cavalier to have cared in the first place; this is for the nights spent dissecting every word and syllable and inflection in his speech, for the nights when you've returned home alone.

This is for the hugs you've received from your female friends, for the nights they've reassured you that you are beautiful and intelligent and amazing and loyal and truly worthy of a great guy. This is for the girls who have been used and abused, who have endured what he was giving because at least he was giving something; this is for the stupidity of the nights we've believed that something was better than nothing, though his something was nothing we'd have ever wanted. This is for the girls who have been satisfied with too little and who have learned never to expect anything more: for the girls who don't think that they deserve more, because they've been conditioned for so long to accept the scraps thrown to them by guys.

Men complain that they never meet nice girls, girls who are genuinely interested and compelling, who are intelligent and sweet and smart and beautiful; men despair that no good women want to share in their lives, that girls play mind games, that girls love to keep them hanging. We nice girls are everywhere. But you're not looking for a nice girl. You're not looking for someone genuinely interested in your intramural basketball game, or your anatomy midterm grade, or that argument you keep having with your father; you're looking for a quick fix.

So don't say you're on the lookout for nice girls, guys, when you pass us up on every step you take. You don't want the nice girls, so don't say you're looking for a relationship: relationships take time and energy and intent, three things we're willing to extend - - but in return, we're looking for compassion and loyalty and trust, three things you never seem willing to express.

Partners

My favorite story people - Mojito Maven posted about them yesterday, I have loved their prints for years. In Lexington, they sell them at Hamilton Robbins, a very VERY fine home furnishings boutique.

This is my favorite one, property of Story People creator Brian Andreas, is called Partners:



The text is: Tied together by stuff too difficult to explain to someone new.

I am sure several of my readers understand why I like this print so much. It is definitely too personal to comment about specifically on here.

Thank you Mojito Maven for reminding me of this childhood favorite artist! As an adult now, I feel like I can relate to them more, where as a child I liked them for being colorful and textured, though 2D in design!

Check out Mojito Maven's entry on Story People, here: http://makemineamojito.com/2009/10/26/story-people/

HELP FIND MORGAN

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. — Police are searching for a Virginia Tech student who hasn't been seen since she was separated from her friends at a Metallica concert Saturday.

Morgan Dana Harrington, 20, was last seen near the John Paul Jones Arena in Charlottesville, Va.

Her parents said they talk to her every day and her disappearance is very out of character.

"Morgan is a pretty transparent kid, who's had a really close relationship with us," her father, Dan Harrington, said in a phone interview Tuesday with the Associated Press. "I don't think there are lots of secrets, so this kind of behavior of (her) missing is not something I think we would expect."

Amy Melvin, her roommate in Blacksburg, Va. told The Roanoke Times Harrington went outside the stadium before Metallica went on stage, but she wasn't sure why.

"Everyone assumed she'd be coming back, " Amanda Melvin, Amy Melvin's older sister told the newspaper. "Sitting here while Morgan is out there missing isn't a very good feeling,"

Harrington drove to the concert and her car was still in parking lot after, the newspaper reported.

Her cell phone and purse were found outside the arena.

Harrington's father, who lives in Roanoke, said his daughter had asked him to help her study for a math test and go through the class schedule for next semester on Sunday. He called her friends around 12:30 p.m. when he realized he had not heard from her.

Dan Harrington told Fox News this not typical behavior for his daughter.

"Morgan is pretty close to us as a family," he said, adidng his daughter didn't have a boyfriend and didn't know if anyone who would want to hurt her. "We don't think she is out there with someone she choose to be with."

Police said Morgan Harrington, a junior majoring in education, was wearing a black T-shirt with "Pantera" across the front in tan letters, a black mini skirt, black tights and black knee-high boots.

She has long blonde hair and blue eyes, is 5-foot-6 and weighs about 120 pounds. She was not carrying an identification card or cell phone.

Investigators are treating the disappearance as a missing person case, said Virginia State Police Lt. Joe Rader.

"We have no evidence that a crime has been committed," he said.

The Associated Press contributed to this report.


Text taken from Fox News: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,568644,00.html





Police continued to seek help Monday in finding a Virginia Tech student from Roanoke County who went missing during a Metallica concert in Charlottesville on Saturday night.

Morgan Dana Harrington, 20, was last seen near John Paul Jones Arena in Charlottesville, according to University of Virginia police.

She had gone to the concert with Amy Melvin, her roommate in Blacksburg, and another friend from James Madison University. Harrington drove.

Melvin said Harrington went outside before Metallica took the stage. She said she wasn't sure why.

"Everyone assumed she'd be coming back," said Amanda Melvin, Amy Melvin's older sister and a friend of Harrington's. Friends and family still haven't heard from Harrington, she said.

Amanda Melvin said Harrington's purse and cellphone were found outside the stadium and her car was still in the parking lot. She said Harrington wouldn't abandon her friends there.

Amy Melvin said she and Harrington have been friends since they were in sixth grade at Northside Middle School.

Harrington is a junior education student at Tech. She's a 2007 graduate of Lord Botetourt High School, according to the school's yearbook. She transferred from Northside High School after the academic year ending 2006, said Chuck Lionberger, spokesman for Roanoke County Public Schools.

She and Melvin, who attends New River Community College, live off campus.

The Rev. Diane Scribner Clevenger, pastor to Harrington's parents, Dan and Gil Harrington, spoke for the family Monday.

"Morgan stays in contact with Dan and Gil every day," she said. She said it was unlike Harrington not to be in touch with her parents.

Clevenger said Harrington's parents are in shock. She said they left early Monday morning for Charlottesville.

Dr. Dan Harrington is the associate dean for clinic and regional integration at the Virginia Tech Carilion School of Medicine, scheduled to open next fall. He has been with Carilion Clinic since 1990.

Friends created a Facebook group -- called "Help find Morgan Dana Harrington" -- to help spread the word that Harrington was missing.

Amanda Melvin said friends want to help in the search but aren't sure what to do. She said she thought about forming a search group to help look for her. For now, they are forwarding her information and photo to everyone they can.

"Sitting here while Morgan is out there missing isn't a very good feeling," she said.

Harrington was last seen wearing a black T-shirt with "Pantera" across the front in tan letters, a black miniskirt, black tights and black knee-high boots, police said. She has long blond hair and blue eyes, is 5 feet 6 inches and weighs about 120 pounds.

Virginia Tech police have been contacted by UVa police and are assisting with the investigation into Harrington's disappearance, Tech police Chief Wendell Flinchum said.

Anyone who has seen Harrington or has knowledge about her whereabouts is asked to call UVa police at (434) 924-7166.

Roanoke Times coverage: http://roanoke.com/news/nrv/wb/223121
CNN coverage: http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/10/21/virginia.missing.student/
CBS Early Show: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J58dZwGrcL0
ABC News: http://abcnews.go.com/US/virginia-tech-student-morgan-dana-harrington-disappears-concert/story?id=8872201
Metallica coverage: http://www.metallica.com/index.asp?item=602638


Police urge anyone with information to contact the Virginia State Police at (434) 352-3435 or by e-mail at bci-appomattox@vsp.virginia.gov. The number for UVA police is (434) 924-7166.

September 11... Never, ever forget

Photo Source: http://www.memeticians.com/


Today I want to remind people of the disaster which happened on September 11, 2001. While I was fortunate enough to not lose anyone in this horrific tragedy, that does not mean my heart didn't break that day. I feel as though a good bit of my naivete cracked that day... as I still cannot forget my first images... I was at Chatham Hall, and I was a junior in boarding school there. It was during my free period, and I was in the computer lab. I checked my email, planning on walking into my Algebra 2 math class that next period. Something inspired me to go downstairs and watch TV. It was right then that they first started coverage on NBC. I immediately ran up to my math teacher, Mr. Toulson, and told him "Something bad is happening in NYC, I think you need to see this...". And he and I ran back downstairs, and the full extent of what was going on hit everyone in the Niche in the face. I sat myself up on the snack bar and held myself. I just couldn't move. I didn't want to move. I thought of my classmates and friends who were from NYC or had friends and family there. I was scared for them. I couldn't begin to fully gauge that this event could be happening anywhere else, like the Pentagon. I was so caught up in the thought that this was occurring, and right in front of me, I saw the other tower fall. I remember thinking that it was like a cascade. A waterfall effect. And if it wasn't a disaster, then it would have been an amazing engineering feat. But it wasn't. It was real. It was scary. It was incalculable to think about it.

I hope everyone remembers and respects on this day.

"Met in the Stairwell" by Stacey Randall

You say you will never forget where you were when you heard the news
On September 11, 2001.
Neither will I..

I was on the 110th floor in a smoke filled room with a man who called his wife to say 'Good-Bye.'
I held his fingers steady as he dialed.
I gave him the peace to say,
'Honey, I am not going to make it, but it is OK... I am ready to go.'

I was with his wife when he called as she fed breakfast to their children.
I held her up as she tried to understand his words
And as she realized he wasn't coming home that night.

I was in the stairwell of the 23rd floor when a woman cried out to Me for help.
'I have been knocking on the door of your heart for 50 years!' I said.
'Of course I will show you the way home - only believe in Me now.'

I was at the base of the building with the Priest ministering to the injured and devastated souls.
I took him home to tend to his Flock in Heaven.
He heard my voice and answered.

I was on all four of those planes, in every seat, with every prayer.
I was with the crew as they were overtaken.
I was in the very hearts of the believers there,
Comforting and assuring them that their faith has saved them.

I was in Texas, Virginia, California, Michigan, Afghanistan...
I was standing next to you when you heard the terrible news.
Did you sense Me?

I want you to know that I saw every face.
I knew every name - though not all knew Me.
Some met Me for the first time on the 86th floor.

Some sought Me with their last breath.
Some couldn't hear Me calling to them through the smoke and flames;
'Come to Me... this way... take my hand.'
Some chose, for the final time, to ignore Me.
But, I was there.

I did not place you in the Tower that day.
You may not know why, but I do.
However, if you were there in that explosive moment in time,
Would you have reached for Me?

Sept. 11, 2001, was not the end of the journey for you.
But someday your journey will end.
And I will be there for you as well.
Seek Me now while I may be found.
Then, at any moment, you know you are 'ready to go.'

I will be in the stairwell of your final moments.

God
[or whomever you believe in]


Stop and think and appreciate God's power, or whomever you love and find to guide you all your days, in your life.



Photo Source: http://lifeinthemix2.co.uk/


If you wrote this, please let me know:

How many of us have heard that question, "Where was your GOD when the World Trade Center and the Pentagon was attacked?" Well, I know where my GOD was the morning of September 11, 2001, and He was very busy!

He was trying to discourage anyone from taking those flights. Those four flights together held over 1000 passengers and there were only 266 aboard. He was on 4 commercial flights giving terrified passengers the ability to stay calm. Not one of the family members who were called by a loved one on one of the hijacked planes said that passengers were screaming in the background. On one of the flights He was giving strength to passengers to try to overtake the hijackers.

He was busy trying to create obstacles for employees at the World Trade Center. After all, only around 20,000 were at the towers when the first jet hit. Since the buildings held over 50,000 workers, this was a miracle in itself. How many of the people who were employed at the World Trade Center told the media that they were late for work or they had traffic delays?

He was holding up two 110 story buildings so that 2/3 of the workers could get out. I was so amazed that the top of the towers didn't topple when the jets impacted. And when they did fall, they fell inward. GOD didn't allow them to topple over, as many more lives would have been lost. And when the buildings went down, my GOD picked up almost 6,000 of His children and carried them home with Him. Reassuring His frightened children that the worst was over and the best was yet to come.

He sat down and cried that 19 of His children could have so much hate in their hearts. That they didn't choose Him, but another god that doesn't exist, and now they are lost forever.

He sent his children that are best trained for this disaster and had them save the few that were still alive, but unable to help themselves. And then sent many others to help in any way they were needed.

He still isn't finished though, He holds the loved ones left behind in His arms. He comforts them daily. His other children are given the strength to reach out to them and help them in any way they can.

And I believe He will continue to help us in what is to come. He will give the people in charge of this great nation the strength and the wisdom to do the right thing. He would never leave us in our time of need. So when anyone asks, "Where was your GOD on September 11th", you can say "everywhere!"

And yes, although this is without a doubt the worst thing I have seen in my life, I see God's miracles in every bit of it. I keep praying for those who don't believe in GOD, every chance I have. I can't imagine going through such a difficult time and not believing in GOD. Life would be hopeless

Source: http://www.allisonsheart.com/yourhand2/stairwell.html



Photo Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/sis/



If you wrote this, please let me know:
*** THE BUILDINGS ***

~ The World Trade Center ~
The twin towers of the World Trade Center were places of employment for some 50,000 people. With the missing list of just over 5,000 people, that means 90% of the people targeted survived the attack.

~ The Pentagon ~

Some 23,000 people were the target of a third plane aimed at the Pentagon. The latest count shows that 123 lost their lives. That is an amazing 99.5% survival rate.

In addition, the plane seems to have come in too low, too early, to affect a large portion of the building. On top of that, the section that was hit was the first of five sections to undergo renovations that would help protect the Pentagon from terrorist attacks. It had recently completed straightening and blast proofing, saving untold lives. This attack was very sad, but a statistical failure.

*** THE PLANES ***

~ American Airlines Flight 77 ~

This Boeing 757 that was flown into the outside of the Pentagon could have carried up to 196 people, yet 64 were aboard. 78% of the seats were empty.

~ American Airlines Flight 11 ~

This Boeing 767 could have had up to 262 people aboard, but carried 92. 74% of the seats were unfilled.

~ United Airlines Flight 175 ~

Another Boeing 767 that could have sat 262 people had 65 people on board. Again, by God's grace, it was 81% empty.

~ United Airlines Flight 93 ~

This Boeing 757 was one of the most uplifting stories yet. The smallest flight to be hijacked with 45 people aboard out of a possible 196 had 84% of its capacity unused. Yet these people stood up to the attackers and thwarted a fourth attempted destruction of a national landmark, saving untold numbers of lives in the process.

*** IN SUMMARY ***

Out of potentially 74,280 Americans directly targeted by these inept cowards, 93% survived or avoided the attacks.

The hijacked planes were mostly empty, the Pentagon was hit at it's strongest point, the overwhelming majority of people in the World Trade Center buildings escaped and a handful of passengers gave the ultimate sacrifice to save even more lives.

Source: http://www.allisonsheart.com/yourhand2/stairwell.html

Jeff Buckley was talented

Looking out the door I see the rain fall upon the funeral mourners
Parading in a wake of sad relations as their shoes fill up with water
And maybe I'm too young to keep good love from going wrong
But tonight you're on my mind so you never know

When I'm broken down and hungry for your love with no way to feed it
Where are you tonight, child you know how much I need it
Too young to hold on and too old to just break free and run

Sometimes a man gets carried away, when he feels like he should be having his fun
And much too blind to see the damage hes done
Sometimes a man must awake to find that really, he has no-one

So I'll wait for you... and I'll burn
Will I ever see your sweet return
Oh will I ever learn

Oh lover, you should've come over
cause its not too late

Lonely is the room, the bed is made, the open window lets the rain in
Burning in the corner is the only one who dreams he had you with him
My body turns and yearns for a sleep that will never come

It's never over, my kingdom for a kiss upon her shoulder
It's never over, all my riches for her smiles when I slept so soft against her
It's never over, all my blood for the sweetness of her laughter
It's never over, she's the tear that hangs inside my soul forever

Well maybe I'm just too young
To keep good love from going wrong

Oh... lover, you should've come over
cause its not too late

Well I feel too young to hold on
And I'm much too old to break free and run
Too deaf, dumb, and blind to see the damage Ive done
Sweet lover, you should've come over
Oh, love well I'm waiting for you

Lover, you should've come over
'cause its not too late
-Jeff Buckley


via Wikipedia: "Lover, You Should've Come Over" is the seventh track on Jeff Buckley's album Grace. Inspired by the ending of the relationship between Buckley and Rebecca Moore, it concerns the despondency of a young man growing older, finding that his actions represent a perspective he feels that he should have outgrown. Biographer and critic David Browne describes the lyrics as "confused and confusing" and the music as "a languid beauty."

The Book of Love

Apparently I am Kreativ!

I was tagged by Park Avenue Princess for the Kreativ Blogger Award :)

The award rules are as follows:

List 7 things that you love, and then pass the award on to 7 bloggers that you love!
Be sure to tag them and let them know that they have won.
You can copy the picture of the award and paste it on your sidebar letting the whole world know... you are Kreativ!

1. I love my Coach purse.

It is kind-of like this one – the Coach Zoe, but mine has a braided black leather handle… It really is wonderful as I can stick all I need in it and it looks incredibly nice with my suits and work stilettos – while easy to dress down for going out with PBF or with my ladies!! [picture source: Coach.com]



2. I love my Coca-Cola!

I am a huge fan of soda, regardless of the fact that it is incredibly bad for me and my heart, but I really monitor my sugar input daily just so I can enjoy this wonderful delicious syrup full of bad awful things!!! I think it all traces back to being in boarding school and the fact that in the basement of one of the dorms, they still had a glass-bottle Coca-Cola dispenser!!
[picture source: http://jyte.com/profile/wonko.com]



3. I love my Pearls!

[picture from: Finksjewelers.com]
I was the only girl throughout my boarding school years that didn't have pearls... I was the only one in my class (of the preppier girls at least) during graduation who it seemed like was without. I had my Tiffany and Co. Elsa Peretti jewelry but not my pearls - which I felt looked so much better with our white dresses we had to wear for Lantern Ceremony anyway. I had grown up with a gorgeous pearl bracelet - but I had outgrown it and never asked for a replacement. And I wanted a set – but because of the unanticipated expense of my education (asking to get out of my hellish public school and be in boarding school like my brother - an unplanned expense for me), I never EVER asked for a set, so I wore my mother's own set that she entrusted to me. Well, when I graduated, on graduation day, right before the ceremony, she handed me a box from Finks. Inside, was my own set of 7.5 mm pearls! She and my Aunt had handpicked each pearl to be strung on my necklace – made with love from my Mom with my Aunt's blessing! (my Aunt used to work at a Finks store).
Here is a picture of my sister and me after the ceremony – she wore a gold silk shift in honor of my "team" (purple versus gold) at school. Fabulous!:




4. I love my hometown – Lex Vegas.
It is so beautiful and I loved the area I grew up in. I couldn't have done without a lot of the people there but I really had a wonderful, blessed childhood with all of the comforts a parent would love to provide. We had a big farm and I had lots of fun parties at the Country Club or at home. Most of my family lived nearby and my Mom was really strong when it came to the significance of God being in our lives. Here are some favorite images of home:

The Farm where I grew up:


View from my parents' new house (which they built in 2000):


Main Street at Christmas time, with my church all decorated:



5. I love my Golden Retriever, Lovely Lady of Lexington.
She is too cute for words!!




6. I love... The Greenbrier!
The Greenbrier is a bittersweet place to mention as it recently filed for Chapter 11. I have spent a week there every other year for the past SEVERAL years. I cannot remember how many times [This isn't including the day trips that we did when I was small for Easter, etc, when we opted out of going to The Homestead]. Here are some pictures from those amazing trips...
My cousin goofing off in the pink (because of Thanksgiving/Christmas – AND GREEN!!) ballroom:


My cousin and I always share a room. This was our Deluxe corner suite we had on a holiday visit. I LOVE TULIPS!!! (many apologies for the un-made bed):


Some of the family gathered for tea in one of the library rooms off of the Main Lobby level...:


Yes, those of you who have been to the Greenbrier know this is one of the "ladies lounges" – I LOVE this room:

It screams sultry boudoir to me – the vintage Vogue covers, the royal purple velveteen chairs with black tassels, the brushed pink wallpaper and the crystal chandeliers. LOVE IT TO PIECES. I would often grab a flute of champagne and "hang out" in here just to get away from the crowds during post-dinner music receptions, etc.

I'm going to miss this place for a lot of reasons - not be be rude - but I can only imagine how messed up the place will be if it gets bought out by some big hotel conglomerate chain company, which means less pay for the deserving workers in the unions at The Greenbrier, and lower-quality goods, etc.


7. I love lingerie! Now, to those who don't know me well, that seems weird. Lingerie? Why not just fashion? Well, I used to sell lingerie on my year off from school (thank you Nordstrom), and then kept with it when I went back to school – Belk, far less glamorous clientele, but still fun! So I have TONS OF LINGERIE. I hope I can go back to working in lingerie again soon.

From Julianna Rae, the Butterfield silk cami and tap pant set:



From Bergdorf Goodman, the raspberry Florentine Gown & Robe, Long (retails at $410.00):



And what boudoir would be complete without a crystal chandelier (thank you Greenbrier!):

   
And a gorgeous chaise lounge (thank you Ethan Allen!) the Monaco Left-Facing Chaise:

 

I tag:

Zazu Pitts: http://brillionaire.blogspot.com/

Kiss On My List: http://kissonmylist.blogspot.com/

Al.Ex: http://alexploresla.blogspot.com/

Lulu: http://nixonsleeves.blogspot.com/

Randall @: http://happyforthismoment.blogspot.com/

FB: http://fabulouslybrokeinthecity.blogspot.com/

Katie: http://asoutherngirlinthecity.blogspot.com/